my refuge

So, as the piano gradually begins I look up at the endlessly setting sun and it shines purity upon my face. Squinting to protect my perspective, I gaze over the tattered rooftops knowing that only my eyes can peer upon this sight to be seen as it will never be this moment again and I am painfully aware it cannot be shared even if that is what I wanted to do. Soon the soft strums of a guitar gently glide in and the sun fully submerges beneath the dangling tree branches and grossly painted apartment buildings. Quickly I am blanketed by the translucent clouds and faint city stars, each one being a reminder that my present is soon to be my past and I am stuck here knowing my past will be my future unless I rise with the sun again tomorrow and choose to set my new day in motion with a purpose. Not the purpose of life, survival or continuation on the same path as each day before like we all seem to be striving for but instead mending the past and overthrowing all that I have accepted as truths and branded into mind as fact. That is when I hear the heavy beat of a drum or possibly my heart pounding against its boney cage, either way I hear it so clearly and evening has somehow drifted to midnight and the shroud of darkness has become my refuge.


13 thoughts on “my refuge

  1. Heart-touching, poetic prose. This statement in particular tagged with my spirit: “My past will be my future unless I rise with the sun again tomorrow and choose to set my new day in motion with a purpose.”

    Oh, yes, change begins with a new purpose. For me that purpose is found in Scripture, where God gives direction. For example, “Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don’t try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he’s the one who will keep you on track” (Proverbs 3:5-6, The Message).

    What a relief! I’ve got Someone who loves me, wants what’s best for me, and in his infinite wisdom has created a one-of-a-kind life for me. On my own I would surely make a huge mess of things.

    But God is a gentleman–he doesn’t operate like an overlord and take over. He’s given me the choice to trust in him or not. The first choice leads to an enhanced life, full of blessings (John 10:10). The second choice leads to dissatisfaction, restlessness, and meaninglessness.

    I am so glad I’ve chosen to trust in Jesus and begin a life of purpose in God’s forever family!

    P.S. Thank you for becoming a follower of my blog. I pray you will find the posts meaningful.

  2. I adore your passionate, healing writing!

    Thank you so much, beautiful sister,
    for liking and following the SolitaryThinkers.

    Much love and many blessings
    to you and your precious daughter.
    May Goddess watch over you both.

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